It's Alright Kukai
by Amulet Misty
Summary: Kukai is in a gloom about something - and Tadase just happens to find that particular something very funny. Fujisakis included.


**A/N: Tadaa! This is just some random crackfic I thought of. Felt like portraying Tadase a little differently than usual - so yes he will be a bit -cough- OOC. **

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**It's Alright Kukai**

Tadase hummed quietly to himself as he entered the royal garden, ready to collect his belongings and head home. To his surprise he found his sports-obsessed senior sitting on a chair while slumping down on the round table.

He did not seem to notice Tadase and he could hear Kukai repeatedly say something along the lines of 'it's a lie - it's a lie - it's a lie-'

The King cleared his throat pointedly and the former Jack finally looked up at him. In the most unenthusiastic voice one could muster, he said, "Hey."

"Souma-kun, may I ask what's bothering you?" Tadase said cautiously.

"I don't want to talk about it." He faced his head down on the table once more and proceeded to bang his fists on it again and again.

Tadase hoped he didn't break the table. If he did there would be a lot of explaining to do to Tsukasa. He really didn't want to wash his car for another two weeks; like he had to when Yaya broke Tsukasa's favourite pot (there wasn't even a flower yet in the pot).

Back to the problem, Tadase asked again and Kukai stayed in his circle of motions. Fist - Table - "Why?" - Fist - Table - "Why?"

Daichi who had been sitting on the edge of the table had enough when Kukai's last bang jolted him off it. He floated towards Tadase and Kiseki.

"He's upset that Nadeshiko turned out to be a boy. Or well that Nadeshiko didn't exist." He grinned down at his bearer who was now glaring daggers at him.

"How could you betray me Daichi?" His eyes flashed angrily. "And you Tadase!" He jumped at his name. "How could you not have told me?"

Oh crap. Tadase _thought _Kukai had been taking it too well earlier today. He didn't think he was so shocked to this extent though. He decided to reply honestly. "It was top-secret Kukai. I did want to tell you."

"But you knew how I felt about her!" Tadase blinked and Kukai covered his mouth immediately.

"You mean Nadeshiko? I don't know how you felt - oh!" Realisation hit Tadase on the head like a tonne of bricks.

_Hey, Tadase where does Nadeshiko live again?_

_Oh, what do you think she wants for her birthday?_

_Stupid Midorikawa - don't you think he's stupid? What's he doing talking to Nadeshiko all the time?  
_  
Then Kukai heard an unexpected sound from Tadase – a giggle. He got to his feet as Tadase continued…he was…he was _laughing_at him!

"Hey! You're supposed to be the kind one here! Why are you laughing?"

"Be-because - you had a crush on _Fujisaki Nagihiko_!" Tadase was unable to stop himself.

"I had a crush on _Nadeshiko_!" Kukai corrected him fiercely. "C'mon she was really hot. I bet you had a crush on her too."

At this point Tadase managed to stop laughing to shake his head and give Kukai a sympathetic smile. This translated to: _Nope, it was just you Souma-kun_. Or:_ Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you just called Fujisaki-kun 'hot'_.

Feeling the need to defend himself, Kukai racked his brain for something intelligent to say. "I've got it! Nadeshiko had fan-boys so you can't say I was the only one!"

"We spent every single day with her – by that I mean _him_. You'd think you'd be able to tell she – by that I mean _he_- was a guy."

"Yaya and Amu couldn't tell!"

"Yuiki-san will believe anything." True. "Fujisaki-kun put extra effort when she was around. Hinamori-san can be very sensitive." Also true. "And anyway how could you think it was weird when 'Nadeshiko' was fine with changing in the _same room_as us during the school festival."

"Well I didn't look..." he mumbled. "I thought maybe it was one of her traditional customs."

Tadase could have done a face-palm here. The traditional custom was the cross-dressing.

"WHY?" Kukai suddenly burst out. An exaggerated stream of tears crashed down like waterfalls on both sides of his face.

"The commoner has gone insane," Kiseki remarked. Tadase wholly agreed.

Kukai turned his back on Tadase and extended his arms out in a melodramatic fashion. "Nadeshiko my sweet love. Where have you gone? My soul is lost without you. Where can I find you?"

"I'm right here Souma-kun." That was Nadeshiko's voice.

"My love!" Kukai yelled turning around to find-

A smiling Nagihiko and a Tadase who was promptly rolling on the floor laughing. Oh why Kukai's pain cause Tadase so much amusement?

"I knew you liked me but I didn't think you liked me that much." Nagihiko was looking thoughtful which irritated the heck out of Kukai because Nadeshiko used to wear that same expression.

"I liked Nadeshiko - not _you_!"

"But he - hah - he _is_Nadeshiko," said Tadase from the floor.

Kukai looked at Nagihiko who nodded. "Don't get me wrong Kukai. I do like you a lot - but not in that way. I'm straight."

"I'm not gay!" Kukai protested and was ignored. "I thought you were a girl."

"Or maybe you're attracted to cross-dressing boys," Tadase remarked helpfully. "And no Kukai, I know I might have a girly face but I'm not gay either. Sorry!"

"I"m straight!"

Nagihiko looked thoughtful again."I suppose since you're my friend maybe I could dress up as Nadeshiko every once in a while. Although if you try anything I'll make _sure_you won't be able to walk anymore."

"For the last time! I like girls! I honestly thought Nadeshiko was a girl."

"A girl who doesn't exist," said Tadase while mock-covering it with a cough.

Kukai glared at him. "Shut up."

"Alright, I'll dress up as her one more time for you so you can say goodbye." The new Jack sighed. "It'll be hard but you're going to have to accept that she's not real."

"Don't worry," Tadase assured him. "We'll help you recover. In fact why don't I give you the number of one of my friends? You've met her before she's-"

"I don't need help!"

"But Souma-kun," Nagihiko said in Nadeshiko's voice in an 'I'm worried about you' way.

Kukai couldn't stop himself from snapping his head around to look at Nagihiko hopefully.

"See?" said Nagihiko normally. "I think you need counselling."

Tadase got up from the floor at last. "I agree." Nagihiko had the best ideas sometimes. Now his best friend wouldn't have to worry about all this.

Nagihiko grabbed Kukai by one arm and Tadase by the other and they started dragging Kukai out of the Royal Garden.

"I think the school counsellor should still be in," said Nagihiko over Kukai's yells for help.

Tadase smiled pleasantly. "No, let's take him to Tsukasa. I'm sure he'll be happy to help him."

"Nooooooo!" Kukai shouted as his friends dragged him to what would become two weeks of staying in Tsukasa's office for an hour a day.

"How does counselling equal washing a car?" Kukai grumbled on one such day.

Meanwhile Nagihiko and Tadase were sipping tea in the Royal Garden. They were _such_ good friends to Kukai.

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**A/N: But seriously I would not like to be counselled by Tsukasa who took Ikuto around with him and never told Tadase until...what, six years later? xD Oh and . Tadase's friend he was going to call was actually Utau. So yes we do know that the counselling worked and it turns out Kukai isn't gay. Hoped you enjoy the fic. **

**-Dina (Amulet Misty/SilentStormfall)**


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